Thank you Malcolm

Sorry for the long post, but there is a reason for it. I am writing this post because I want you to know whom you are dealing with and to ask you to stand up for yourself. I might still be upset, but I assure you, I am ok. I also want you to know that this is not personal; it is my way of telling you how people should not behave. I definitely don’t want to make a big deal about this, but I want others to know about this.

Some of you know me better than others, but I am sure you all know that I am an honest person, and not a “trouble-maker “. Below is a story I want to share with you.

During the Garneau Centennial, I asked Derri if I could have a copy of the office keys (as I play a lot, and there are 5 or 6 people who play with me on a regular basis), since Kendra left, I thought her key would be available. Derri said that it wouldn’t be a problem to get a key because I was a member of the executive and a long time member of Garneau.

I also wanted to take more responsibility, since some of the Garneau members were not happy with the fact that the office was closed on Sept 1st, and therefore, they couldn't play longer hours (i.e. in the evening once it got dark). I only needed a key so I could turn on the lights, now that daylight is getting shorter. With the new courts, we can easily have a longer season. I felt that someone from the board should be proactive, and since I play every day until 9 or 10 PM, I decided to take charge. This is the only reason why I wanted the keys.

On Monday, Sept 1st, I talked to Cara, and she mentioned that Malcolm took Kendra’s keys, as he had forgotten his own. This meant that Malcolm had 2 sets of keys. Cara then mentioned that I could get Jeff’s keys, as he had 2 sets as well. So, that afternoon I saw Jeff on the courts and asked him if I could have 1 set of keys (I explained that I needed them to be able to turn the lights on, and that Derri had agreed to it). Jeff gave me the keys and I was very happy, since now I would be able to play longer into the evenings. Of note, other members (Vic, Jack, Fandhi, Ignacio, Samantha, Rob, Peter, Forrest, Lucy, Randy, Bev, Sanjay, Felix, Stephan...) were also happy, as they could also play longer and make full use of their membership.

Derri was on the courts on Wednesday night (Sept 3rd), and he saw me turning the lights on, and he didn’t mention anything about me having the keys.

I played every evening since Sept 1st, and since I don’t have a swipe card (for the Arts Centre) and I didn’t want to complicate things for myself, I made sure that the lights were turned off before the Arts centre staff went home. Therefore, we would finish playing tennis around 9 PM every night.

I’ve enjoyed my years at Garneau and I have made many friends there, and have shared good and bad games of tennis with them. As a member of the board since 2002, I have invested many hours of my free time to help the Garneau tennis club become the best club in the city.

However, what happened tonight (Friday, Sept 5th) will make me reconsider being a Garneau volunteer.

I was playing tennis with Vic and Jack Pan, and around 8:15 PM Malcolm showed up. I didn’t see him as I was playing but he interrupted our game by telling me “Give me the keys”. I didn’t understand what he wanted, so I asked what this was all about, and he just repeated, “Give me the keys”. I must say that the manner in which he said this, the intimidating tone of his voice, made me feel very uncomfortable. I was surprised by this rudeness. I asked him “what is the reason for taking the keys from me”, and he said that I “didn’t have authority”, that they cannot give the keys to the membership, and that he just talked to Derri on the phone about it.

Malcolm:"Garneau is MY private club!"

Since Malcolm was very unpleasant and threatening, I gave him the keys.
As he left the courts, I told him that I would talk to Derri about this, and I told him that Derri approved me having the keys. I also told him that Garneau wasn’t his private club, and he said, “It is! I have authority“.

Ten minutes later, I went to the office and told Malcolm that I wanted to talk to Derri, because I was upset about this. Again, Malcolm showed me a complete lack of emotional intelligence, telling me that I “didn’t have authority”, and that I cannot have the keys. He also didn’t want to give me Derri’s phone number??

Malcolm: "You are a jerk!"

Malcolm didn’t care about my feelings, and he couldn’t understand that we’ve known each other for years, and that perhaps he should behave as a mature and respectable man. I said that he wasn’t nice to me, since: 1) he rudely interrupted our game, 2) he used a very unpleasant and threatening tone of voice and 3) he ordered me to give him the keys.

As an adult and as a person with “authority”, I feel that he should probably have better communication skills. I told him, that as an adult he should have first said “Good evening Boris. How are you? Do you have a minute? I wanted to ask you if you could return the keys, as I talked to Derri, and we agreed that it is better for now that you don’t have the keys... Blah...Blah“. I also said that I wasn’t aware about his “authority”, and that perhaps he should have educated me. He said that the tone of his voice was normal, and that he “knows his voice” and that he “would educate me at a board meeting“. I told him that he couldn’t talk to me like this and completely disrespect me. Obviously this was too much for Malcolm, as he showed his real face by telling me: ”You are a jerk“.

I didn’t understand what I did to be called a jerk, but I figured out that it was probably the way Malcolm communicates, and since there was nothing else for me to say, I just said that we’ll talk at our board meeting about this, and I left.

Later, Malcolm asked me if I had a swipe card, and then he ”suggested” that I write an e-mail to Derri (and cc Malcolm) about the keys. No apology, nothing, as nothing happened.

Malcolm: "Give me the keys!!"

The point of all this is that I don’t care about keys anymore. It is Malcolm’s behavior that is troubling. He called Garneau his private club, he intimidated me, and he called me a jerk. This brings up the question - how can he get away with that, with what authority, and does he have any right to behave that way?

Malcolm has endangered the reputation of the Garneau Tennis club with his lack of human relations skills. I am wondering what Garneau members would say about this, and if they would want to be members of a club where people are bullied??

Playing tennis is supposed to be a fun activity, where people get along with each other. As a volunteer, I am interested in making the club a better place. However, I am not interested in going to the courts to be bullied and aggressively intimidated.

We have a serious problem here, and I have a dilemma. Should I let this go (and enable Malcolm to abuse someone else), or should I stand up for myself and defend myself and the Garneau tennis club reputation from uncivilized people?

We've lost good people in the past because of similar behavior (remember Hone for example, our beloved webmaster?), and we will lose more people next year. We cannot allow people without class to embarrass the club and disregard great volunteer work.

As a president, Derri (or whoever is going to be a next president) is responsible for addressing this issue, and he should talk to Malcolm, and perhaps educate him about people skills. Personal relationships shouldn't come before a healthy atmosphere on the board, and especially before the interests of the Garneau Tennis Club. I am very disappointed in Malcolm; I thought that he, as a member of the Edmonton firefighters community, would know more about human relations and possess better people skills.

I also must say, that if Malcolm has any balls, he will apologize to me and especially to the Garneau members for proclaiming that Garneau is "his" private club.

Fortunately, he will have a chance to do that, as our Annual General Meeting is scheduled for the end of September.

This is what I found disturbing:
- Malcolm interrupted our tennis game - that is very rude, complete lack of tennis etiquette
- Malcolm exercised his “power“ over me - that is not acceptable. I haven’t been Garneau volunteer for 6 years to be treated like that. Even if I am "only" a member, this is unacceptable.
- Malcolm said that Garneau was “his private club“- who the hell do you think you are, Malcolm?
- Malcolm called me a jerk - because I asked him to behave in a civilized way? I didn’t volunteer and spend so many hours in making Garneau better place to be called like that. However, his tells me a lot about him as a person.

This is what didn’t bother me:
- Malcolm wasn’t friendly - mean people don’t make friends
- Malcolm couldn’t carry on a civilized conversation - lack of emotional intelligence is his problem
- Malcolm showed his real face - sooner or later people who think they have power show their real face
- Malcolm didn’t apologize for his behavior - I didn’t expect it, as he showed me his “ class“
- Malcolm lost a friend (or acquaintance) for beer

The bottom line here is that I only wanted to play tennis and to prolong the season; by helping our members play more and make the most of their membership. Even though I got permission from the president to get the keys, I was still abused and bullied. Something is wrong here. No matter what laws, rules and procedures exist, we still should behave in civilized way. If this happened in a work environment Malcolm would be sued for harassment.

What did I learn from all of this? Malcolm showed me how people should not be treated, and I thank him for that.
Thank you Malcolm.

I failed to be a considerate colleague

We had another 'all staff' meeting, and this one was held in two different locations, Calgary and Edmonton.

In Edmonton we met in the 16th floor board room, in ATB Place. As meeting was different than previous 2 that we had with Mike Redeker in Red Deer, I wanted to add some of my observations.

It reminded me a bit to "Chit, Chat and Chew with Chet" session(s) that we had in the past when Chet Niemzcyk was our leader. I am sure that some of our current IT staff still remembers that.

There was a lot of information presented by Redeker, and there were very few questions asked by the audience. Or at least, there were very few important questions. Or, were there any important questions?

We learned that HR is working (again) on our accountability profiles [comparing salaries + (I don't know what else) to other companies?] and that they'll need "some time" to get it done.
I remember, couple of years ago similar was done when Mark Ripplinger was CIO. Ron Kryzanovski from HR was doing it.
I don't know if anything happened with that investigation. Nothing was ever communicated to me. Or I missed it?

That is why I hope; we'll get some information about this new research. Perhaps, they could show us and educate us what exactly they been working on? Perhaps status reports with their weekly achievements could help us to better understand such important topics?

I could write a lot more about this, but I won't as my fingers hurt, and my back hurts.

My back and feet hurt on Monday too, as I was standing for almost hour and half in the 16th floor board room.
There were 46 people in the room, and 26 of them had chairs. This means that 20 of us were standing. In hour and half, only one person offered her seat to her colleague. I say to her 'Bravo'.
So 19 of us had a chance to stretch our spines and practice balancing. I am sure we benefited by that, as too much sitting affect our posture and our bones. We were so lucky!
I have to apologize though, to 25 people who were so unlucky to sit for 90 minutes, for not giving them opportunity to take my place and to stand a bit, and especially for not giving them health benefits I got.
Sorry I failed to be a considerate colleague.

Kings and Thieves

I want to write about work. About good and bad things that happen to us while working. Perhaps to write about some topics that people don't write about, or they don't want to hear about. To write about corporate "culture", corporate power, self serving "leaders" and bosses, about kings and thieves, greed...

It is not going to be all dark - there are great people that we work with, people who lift our spirits and encourage us, and help us. People who help us to become great.

Kings and thieves could be identified here - I am thankful to both of them - each one of them taught me something.